Here’s how to know he likes you… and how to know he doesn’t

Monday, February 25, 2013

I have been getting requests to address this topic for a while now, and truthfully, I have kinda been avoiding it. But @shrstewart Tweeted a request for this to be my next column, and I figured it’s time to talk about it even though it’s probably going to get me in a bit of hot water.

You would think it would be obvious for a woman to figure out whether or not a guy likes her. I mean, they made a movie about it, didn’t they? But in thinking about it, between the games people play, the way that dating has changed over the years, and a lot of women not having that much dating experience, it can be tricky.

So here are the top 10 signs he likes you. Note that this is from my perspective, and not every guy is like me, so don’t kill the messenger.

1. Body language. This is the most basic, but one of the most telling signs. Does he always seem to touch you when he’s talking to you? Does he try to get close to you when you’re in the same location? Or do you always catch him looking at you? He likes you.

2. Reaching out. Does he initiate the calls, BBMs or Whatsapp messages? He likes you. If he doesn’t answer when you call, does he always call you back? If he’s online and doesn’t reach out, well you know “whatsup” — he likes you not.

3. Date night. This may sound very trivial but it means a lot. If you’ve only seen the inside of his room when you’re there for one reason only, then he likes you not. If he likes you he will take you out, movies, dinner, trips, breakfasts, the beach etc, etc.

4. Substance. The conversations or messages go beyond “what are you wearing?” There is substance to them. Whether he’s checking in on how your day was, remembering something you told him was bothering you, or engaging in meaningful conversation, he likes you.

5. He shares his whereabouts. Yes, this is a big deal. If he tells you he’s on his way to the gym, by his bredren playing dominoes, or he’s still stuck at work, it means a lot. We don’t really give away that kind of intel, so it’s not to be taken lightly. He likes you.

6. He sees you on consecutive days. If you go out on Friday night and he calls you again on Saturday to do something else, then yuh ting shat like M-16. Better yet, if you spend the whole weekend together your ting gone a lead — he likes you. If you see him once a week or every other week or he calls you after 10/11 pm to “come by”, he likes you only for a specific reason.

7. He avoids you. If you see his BB status and picture change to a picture of him in Fiction and you tell him you’re there but he makes no effort to find you, avoids you, or he leaves right after, he doesn’t want to be where you are. He likes you not.

8. He shows up unexpectedly. If you had a conversation and told him you were out with friends and out of the blue he appears at the same location, this is a big signal he wants to see you. He likes you.

9. Lack of communication. You start 99 per cent of the conversations. You initiate the calls and messages. His responses consist of “yea” and “k”. Sometimes silence speaks louder than words — he likes you not.

10. He’s generous. He’s bought something for you without you asking. And I’m not talking about Christmas or birthday gifts, I’m talking out of the blue gifts, or as I call them, ‘just because’ gifts. He likes you.

I hope that these tips were helpful and that you better understand our actions or lack thereof. Ladies, all I can say is go with your gut as you probably already know how he feels about you.